It Doesn't Pay to Be Smart as a Public School Teacher, part one

Yeeeaaarrrrssss ago, I remember almost crying in frustration one day in front of my two Black male coworkers. I pronounced to them,

I thought I came into education...and everyone was going to be smart...that this was a place for innovation and...."

(There was a little more to this sentence, but my memory is failing me in the moment.)

The two of them looked at me so tenderly, then looked at one another...AND...BURST OUT LAUGHING. I was immediately taken aback. One responded,

You are in the WRONG FIELD, Baby Girl. There are no smart people in [public school] education.

Interestingly, at that time, both of the men were working on their PhDs. They did so during work hours. In fact, they revealed to me that they had taken this particular job that we all occupied so that they could do their school assignments during work. The job was just holding space and time for them. They did just enough to say it was done. And it seemed that no one bothered them about it. Yet here I was all excited...doing so much in the classroom...and wanting to do so much more for the students and their parents...while being unable to stay out of trouble for miscellaneous shit (for which I still have all the e-mails) from my new white woman supervisor and her about-to-retire white man boss.

People do not like smart people. If this does not sit well with you, think about it for a second...

If you are smart, you will be admired by some, but the majority will have disdain for you. When you speak, people will be intimidated. When you try to share ideas and collaborate in problem-solving, they will find away to push you to the background to ignore you. Whatever insecurities people have, they will project them onto you. When they perceive that you have failed, they will be relieved.

If you are a smart Black woman, you will certainly be on your own. Our mamas taught us to be strong for a reason. They said,

We have to be twice as good.

They said,

Don't cry in front of them at work.

And our grandmas declared,

No weapons formed against us shall prosper.

So, we carry those messages around and lean in on them during the many moments of weakness. Black. Women. Are. Superheroes.

Back then, I didn't quite understand what my coworkers said those years ago. But in the past two years, with a lot mentorship, many years of counseling, and continuous introspection, I have the utmost clarity--particularly at this time when anti-intellectualism seems to be at an all time high. There is no place to be smart in the public education system. Many enlightened people can agree that K - 12 is where students to learn to be orderly and compliant--cogs in the system...workers for the machine. But the same thing applies to the adults.

What did your people teach you about existing in the workplace/world?